Making Your Marriage Work Despite Opposing Work Shifts

Making Your Marriage Work Despite Opposing Work Shifts

Working opposite shifts with your partner can lower the opportunities you get to spend quality time with each other. 

With less time for face-to-face interactions with your spouse, it becomes difficult to communicate, connect and maintain intimacy. 

However, despite having opposing work shifts with your partner, there are ways you can still make your marriage work.

For one, you can allocate couples time in your weekly schedules. 

Create time to have fun, discuss marriage-related topics, go on a short trip and keep the romance alive. 

Doing this with your spouse allows you to bond and connect with each other on deeper levels.

Similarly, you can practice healthy communication habits with your partner. 

Schedule a no-tech time to actively listen to your partner and share experiences with each other. 

Regular healthy communication allows you to remain present in their life even when you're not there,

Equally, sharing household responsibilities with your spouse will help you avoid conflicts later on. 

Regardless of the different time schedules, you can have a discussion with your partner about how to equally divide household responsibilities to keep the home running.

Read on to learn insightful ways you can make your marriage work despite opposing work shifts:

Marriages & Couples Therapists in Colorado

Randal Thomas, SWC

Randal Thomas, SWC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 602-1342
Jennifer Luttman, LPC, ACS

Jennifer Luttman, LPC, ACS

(719) 345-2424
Heather Comensky, LPC

Heather Comensky, LPC

Aurora, Colorado
(720) 449-4121
Margot Bean, LCSW

Margot Bean, LCSW

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Seth Boughton, SWC

Seth Boughton, SWC

(720) 449-4121
Melanie Klinke, MA, MFTC, LPCC

Melanie Klinke, MA, MFTC, LPCC

(719) 345-2424
Hailey Gloden, MA, LPC, NCC

Hailey Gloden, MA, LPC, NCC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 602-1342
Donna Janiec, LPC, NCC

Donna Janiec, LPC, NCC

(719) 345-2424
Katie (Kate) Castillo, MS, LPCC

Katie (Kate) Castillo, MS, LPCC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Jessica Gutierrez-Gaytan, SWC

Jessica Gutierrez-Gaytan, SWC

(719) 345-2424

Allocate Couples Time

Despite having opposing work shifts, it is essential to set time apart for your partner to maintain intimacy and connection. 

Pick at least a day in a week to hang out, catch up with each other, and bond over shared hobbies.

With different schedules, you get less free time for romantic dates and adventures. 

However, being intentional about spending time with your partner can make it easier to create free time from your busy schedules. 

During your free time, you can go on a dinner date with your spouse and have meaningful conversations with each other while you enjoy the night.

Also, you can try as much as possible to do things with each other and for each other every day. 

You can decide to eat, read, or watch a movie with your partner daily. 

You can also do things for them to remind them you still love and cherish them.

Similarly, during couples time you can discuss your family logistics. 

Making solo decisions for the family because your partner is not around can affect your relationship. 

It is essential to discuss decisions, plans, goals, and finances with your spouse as a family.

Practice Healthy Communication Habits

After a long day of work, it is normal to want to relax, check up on your extended family, check emails and engage in personal activities to wrap up your day. 

However, if you have opposing work shifts with your spouse, you need to readjust the time allocated to those activities, so you can spend quality time with your spouse.

One healthy communication habit you should practice is turning off your tech devices when talking to your spouse. 

You can unintentionally spend so much of your free time on your technological gadgets and devices if you don't make conscious efforts to take time off.

Once there are no distractions, actively listen to your partner. 

Your spouse probably has a lot of achievements, struggles, and experiences to tell you, but you need to show them you are interested and ready to listen. 

Talking about individual experiences will allow you to bond together and understand each other better,

Similarly, you don't have to limit communication with your partner to only face-to-face interactions. 

During your work breaks, you can call your partner, send texts, pictures, memes, or GIFs just to laugh and bond with them for a few minutes. 

Doing this can also help relieve work tension and stress.

Make Time for Intimacy 

When life gets busy, it is necessary to schedule things meaningful to you. 

Physical intimacy is a vital aspect of a healthy marriage. 

Thus, if you and your spouse have opposing work shifts and can't seem to be in the mood for physical intimacy simultaneously, it is advisable to schedule it.

A sexless marriage can affect your relationship with your spouse so if you are on track to one, get off as soon as possible. 

Make an agreement with your partner to put effort into prioritizing sex to maintain physical intimacy in your marriage.

Usually, sex happens spontaneously however, planning for it can be more intriguing than you know. 

Having sex time allows your body to build up sexual tension and get physically ready for the experience. 

When you near your scheduled time, you can tell your partner seductive things you'd like to do with them in bed to make them excited.

Also, if your scheduled time doesn't eventually work out, you don't have to force it. 

Intimacy is not all about sex. 

There are several other ways to reignite passion and have pleasure with your spouse. 

You just need to find what works for both of you.

Support Your Spouse

When you have opposing work shifts with your spouse, it is possible to easily get lonely during your solo time. 

It can be more difficult when your partner gets back home and feel exhausted to spend time with you. 

Notwithstanding, it is important to understand that your partner probably feels the same way too and needs your support.

Instead of nagging and complaining to your spouse after they just had a long day, be there for them and give them lots of hugs. 

Create a safe space for your spouse so they feel happy and relaxed when they come home to you.

Also, it is essential to respect your partner's alone time. 

It can be tempting to intrude on their alone time or sleep to spend more time with them; however, you need to understand that they need time alone to refresh their mind and rest.

Balancing being an efficient worker and a good spouse can be difficult and stressful. 

It requires effort and hard work to maintain the bar for both tasks; thus, regularly encourage and support your spouse every opportunity you get.

Share Household Responsibilities 

Disputes can occur If one partner does the majority of the household chores. 

Despite your opposing work shifts, it is important to set free time to discuss household responsibilities and how to share them with your partner.

In dividing household responsibilities, you have to be considerate of each other's work schedule and allow each other to do things their own way. 

Give them time and space to settle down after work before rushing into a list of household chores they haven't done.

Also, you can assist your spouse with their chores when you have free time. 

Sharing responsibilities means you are on the same team, so don't be afraid to lend your partner a helping hand when they need one.

Similarly, you can find ways to make your monotonous household chores with your partner fun. 

When doing tasks like cooking or cleaning, you can have quality time with your spouse by playing your favorite songs and dancing together.


Having opposing work shifts with your partner can make spending quality time and communication difficult. 

However, there are ways you can maintain a strong bond in your marriage and intimacy with your spouse regardless of the shifts you work.

Those ways include allocating couples' time, practicing healthy communication habits, being supportive, sharing household responsibilities, and making time for intimacy.


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May 18th, 2024

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