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Learn How to Deal With These Negative Emotions in Your Marriage

Neglect, sadness, stress, anger, and fear are some primary negative emotions that may pop up in marriage from time to time because of the human characteristic of making errors.

They may also pop up because of events at work or with other people.

Thus, it's essential to learn how to deal with these negative emotions in your marriage to have a happy relationship.

You can experience neglect in your marriage if your partner is dealing with certain emotions on their lonesome and they are busy with work and not adding their private life to the essential things.

You can deal with the neglect by talking about it and working to solve it together.

If you are struggling with sadness, it will be a great idea to deal with it decisively to prevent it from stopping you from staying happy for your partner.

Instead of welling up in sadness and blaming yourself or others for the cause, tell your partner what went wrong and allow them to console you.

Similarly, if you feel stressed about work expectations, family problems, or home upkeep, make sure you don't think alone.

Try to tell your partner about the issues bothering you and create time to relax so the stress can wash over you.

Involving your partner will help them know you are stressed and you need them to help you relax.

You can consider a detailed overview of how to deal with these negative emotions in your marriage:

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When You Feel Neglected by Your Partner

Getting neglected by your partner can hurt deeply because your partner is expected to be your companion throughout life.

Abandonment of your affairs by your life-long companion can make you start to have depressing thoughts.

Thus, learning to deal with negative emotions in your marriage can help you solve the issue of neglect.

To deal with the feeling of neglect in your mind, you should initiate a discussion with your partner about your hurt feelings.

In the conversation, avoid playing the victim card as this will seem accusatory, and they will get defensive.

To have a meaningful conversation with them, focus on how bad you feel and how to fix it.

Also, ensure you try to trace the cause of their neglect. If the behavior began recently, it might be easy to trace it to a specific event whose details you can use to solve the issue easily.

However, if you analyze the beginning properly and discover a trace of neglect has always been in their behavior, it may be more difficult to solve it.

Whatever your plan is for dealing with the emotion, ensure it's not entirely reliant on them.

A marriage takes two to tango, and where they can't see your hurt feelings, it's your duty to be proactive and create a constructive method for solving the problem.

When an Occurrence Makes You Sad

You could experience a bout of sadness if your spouse does something painful to you, especially if it was intentional.

Asides from your partner, other external factors may also cause you sadness.

For example, if your work performance was poor or you failed a crucial professional examination, you may experience sadness.

As consistent across negative emotions in your marriage, the best way to start dealing with sadness is to inform your partner of what's making you sad and how deep it hurts.

Telling them helps them stay in the loop of what's wrong and gives them the chance to help you feel better.

If they are the cause of your sadness, try to focus on sharing your hurt feelings rather than blaming them for causing it.

Telling them how sad you are will make them go into an instinctual protective mode that will cause them to apologize and long for your happiness once again.

When they apologize and seek to make you happy once more, it's time to dispel your negative feelings and focus on the past positives.

Try to rationalize their action as a slip-up and give them a chance to make things right.

You can even propose more time together to have you back to positivity in your marriage.

Woman sitting on the edge of a dock overlooking the water

When You are Under a Lot of Stress

Undergoing general life stress can cause a strain on your marriage because it may prevent you from sorting through your negative emotions.

The buildup of negative emotions in your marriage is not healthy as it will continue to cause clashes between you and your partner; hence, you should understand how to deal with stress.

A great way to deal with stress is to ensure that you and your partner contribute to the home in a balanced manner.

If you have been doing a larger percentage of the responsibilities, it may be the cause of your stress.

When you split the duties equally between both of you, you get to reduce the stress you are undergoing.

You should also engage in stress-relieving methods like spending time apart and together.

If you both enjoy different interests, you can easily spend time apart and relieve your stress on your lonesome or with your other friends.

Also, make sure to come home and spend quality time with your partner to reduce the occurrence of stress in your marriage.

Spending quality time with them will help you make your marriage a priority once more.

On a subconscious level, the lack of joy or romance in a marriage subtly adds to the piled-up stress in the mind.

Therefore, when you spend time with your partner and feel that your marriage is getting more fulfilled, you will notice a sudden drop in stress.

When an Incident Has Made You Angry

Generally, it's easier to get angry in a marriage than in other relationships because of the closeness with your partner and the limitless opportunities to get them angry.

If you combine the factors with the human likelihood to make errors, it becomes evident that anger will be one of the negative emotions in your marriage.
When you are angry, do not try to avoid conflict as it will simply lead to pent-up emotions and resentment.

Instead, you should tell your partner exactly how you feel so they realize what is happening and seek ways to resolve the issue.

Furthermore, ensure you do not fight fire with fire.

If they have done something to annoy you, try not to shout at them or repay them with something terrible. Instead, be calm and rationalize it as something that should not cause you to stray from your goodness.

Then, try to think of the incident from their perspective. When you empathize with their actions, you may discover that they probably never intended to annoy you.

The empathy will help you easily accept their apology and move on with your blissful marriage.

When You are Scared of Future Events

Fear is a silent killer of dreams and good intentions as it can make you feel defeated even before embarking on a course of action.

If you fear that your partner may cheat or eventually leave you, it may prevent you from loving them as deeply as you should, which may subsequently cause what you fear.

Hence, it's crucial that you learn to deal with such negative emotions in your marriage.

You can tackle the fear you feel by doing the right thing in the face of the fear.

You should consider the benefits of doing the right thing and use the projected benefits to motivate you past your fears.

Similarly, make sure to dispel other people's thoughts from your mind because thoughts of what others would think are usually the cause of fear in many situations.

Instead of considering their thoughts, think about how the event's outcome would benefit you and get involved if the benefits are great.

An exciting way to deal with fear is to fuel your moves with your love for your partner.

If you believe an outcome will benefit your partner, you can use your love for them to create an internal motivator to get past the fear.

Conclusion

Having negative emotions in your marriage is normal, but leaving them to dwell is abnormal.

You should ensure that you are swift to deal with neglect, sadness, stress, anger, and fear so they don't cause far-reaching emotional troubles in your marriage.

Resources

https://www.brides.com/emotional-neglect-in-marriage-5195578

https://www.symbis.com/blog/6-things-to-do-when-happiness-fades-in-your-marriage/

https://www.shermanconsulting.net/2018/06/22/reduce-stress-marriage/

https://www.healthline.com/health/coronavirus-pandemic-stress-anxiety-relationship

https://www.symbis.com/blog/3-strategies-for-successfully-managing-anger-in-marriage/

https://www.symbis.com/blog/critical-tips-for-overcoming-fear-in-marriage-and-life/

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About the author

Adewale Ayeni-Bepo

I'm a lawyer and content writer committed to helping people learn how to live mentally healthy lives. My pieces focus on identifying the issues and highlighting their solutions. It's my belief that every person can live a mentally healthy life.

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