How to Repair a Marriage After Alcoholism

Couple on bicycles

Recovering from the effects of alcoholism on a marriage is a difficult process, but it is possible.

With commitment, respect, and hard work, couples can begin rebuilding their relationship.

Read this overview of the steps involved in repairing a marriage after alcoholism and provide helpful tips for restoring trust between partners.

This article also outlines how couples can find support to complete the process successfully together.   


Marriages & Couples Therapists in Colorado

Kalsey Hartley, MS, LPCC

Kalsey Hartley, MS, LPCC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 452-4374
Hailey Gloden, MA, LPCC, NCC

Hailey Gloden, MA, LPCC, NCC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 602-1342
Randal Thomas, SWC

Randal Thomas, SWC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 602-1342
Katie (Kate) Castillo, MS, LPCC

Katie (Kate) Castillo, MS, LPCC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Travis Call, MA, MFTC

Travis Call, MA, MFTC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 452-4374
Seth Boughton, SWC

Seth Boughton, SWC

Aurora, Colorado
(720) 449-4121
Donna Janiec, LPC, NCC

Donna Janiec, LPC, NCC

Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Heather Comensky, LPC

Heather Comensky, LPC

Aurora, Colorado
(720) 449-4121
Margot Bean, LCSW

Margot Bean, LCSW

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Jane Neuffer, LPC

Jane Neuffer, LPC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 481-3518

Understand the Problem

Recognize and acknowledge the impact of alcoholism on your marriage.

To repair a marriage after alcoholism, it is essential to first recognize and acknowledge the impact of addiction on the relationship.

This includes understanding how alcohol has contributed to patterns of communication, dysfunction, and hurt that have been building up over time.

It can also help to assess the current state of the marriage and identify any immediate needs for change or improvement.

Both partners must come together honestly and openly to discuss the effects of alcoholism on their relationship and be willing to take responsibility for past mistakes.   


Get Treatment

Seek help from qualified professionals to address addiction and other related mental health issues.

Seeking help from qualified professionals is an important step in repairing a marriage after alcoholism.

Licensed therapists, addiction specialists, and/or mental health professionals can provide advice and guidance on dealing with both the addiction problem as well as any mental health issues that may be affecting the relationship.

Each partner needs to take ownership of their own recovery process, but qualified professionals can offer invaluable support along the way.

Couples counseling can also be beneficial for providing insight into the dynamics of the marriage and developing effective communication skills for resolving conflicts in a healthy manner.

Rebuild Trust

Begin working to restore the relationship between you and your partner.

Rebuilding trust is a key part of repairing a marriage after alcoholism.

This means both partners must work to restore the connection between them that may have been broken due to addiction and its related issues.

It takes time to build back trust, but it is possible with patience and dedication.

Steps such as expressing remorse for any past misdeeds and showing genuine care and respect towards one another are key to creating a more secure bond.

Additionally, using productive communication techniques like active listening can also help to bridge the gap between you and your partner so that a healthier relationship can begin to take shape.

Practice Open Communication

Create a safe space to talk about difficult feelings, wishes, and concerns.

Creating a safe space to talk about difficult feelings, wishes, and concerns is essential when rebuilding trust in a marriage after alcoholism.

Both partners should take turns to openly share their experiences and thoughts without interruption or judgment.

It's important to remember that both parties are on a journey of healing, so it's vital that everyone is treated with respect when discussing the struggles they face.

Additionally, it can be helpful to set boundaries for each person ahead of time so that everybody feels comfortable in the space being created.

With an understanding environment, partners can more easily offer one another empathy and kindness which is necessary for restoring the relationship between them.

Make Healthy Changes Together

Promote positive changes in daily life such as exercise, eating well, or taking time for self-care.

Promoting positive changes in daily life is an important step in rebuilding trust after alcoholism.

Exercise, healthy eating habits, and taking time for self-care are all beneficial activities that can help to improve both physical and mental health.

Not only does this provide a space for reflection, but it also encourages couples to start investing in their relationship.

This can involve scheduling regular date nights or just discovering new things together.

As partners focus on building themselves up individually as well as nourishing the connection between them, trust will have a greater chance of being completely restored over time.

Find Support for Yourself 

Seek out resources that can help you along your recovery journey such as therapy or support groups.

Seeking out resources to help with recovery journeys is a valuable step on the path to restoring trust in a marriage after alcoholism.

Therapy and support groups offer essential guidance, understanding, and advice for couples rebuilding their relationships.

By utilizing such resources, each partner can gain insight into their individual struggles and those of their spouse in order to develop better communication and constructive problem-solving skills.

Therapy and/or support groups provide a safe space for expressing feelings as well as learning from the experiences of others who have also gone through similar situations.

By using these tools, couples can work towards forming healthier lifestyles which will ultimately help them restore trust in one another once again.

Make Amends and Move Forward

Find ways to repair the damage from past problems and commit to doing better in the future.

As partners work to repair the damage from past problems caused by alcoholism, it is essential that they commit to doing better in the future.

This may involve making changes in behaviors, communication habits, and routines.

For instance, couples might opt for a healthier diet and create a fitness plan together.

They can also practice openly communicating their feelings with one another and actively listen to each other's points of view without judgment or criticism.

Couples should make an effort to stay organized and be consistent with staying on top of household chores or other obligations each person has agreed upon.

By doing so, they send one another a signal that they genuinely care about how the relationship progresses and are willing to take concrete steps toward rebuilding trust between them.

Conclusion

Rebuilding trust in a marriage after alcoholism is an ongoing process.

It requires patience, consistency, and the willingness to make changes for the betterment of both parties.

Couples should prioritize communication, understanding, and forgiveness in order to restore their connection with one another.

Making healthy lifestyle changes together, finding external support, and making amends to repair the damage are all important steps in the process of repairing a marriage after alcoholism.

With dedication, determination, and compassion for one another, couples can rebuild trust and restore their relationship so that it is stronger than ever before.

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December 2nd, 2023

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