How to Make Your Spouse Feel Special

How to Make your Spouse Feel Special

Keeping the spark alive in a long-term relationship can sometimes be a challenge.

You may feel like you've tried everything, but it's still possible to make your spouse feel special.

It's important because feeling loved and appreciated is essential to a happy and healthy relationship.

Here are some tips, ideas, and strategies for married couples who have been together for a long time.  

Marriages & Couples Therapists in Colorado

Abigail Corless, LPCC

Abigail Corless, LPCC

(719) 345-2424
Katie (Kate) Castillo, MS, LPCC

Katie (Kate) Castillo, MS, LPCC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Randal Thomas, SWC

Randal Thomas, SWC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 602-1342
Jennifer Luttman, LPC, ACS

Jennifer Luttman, LPC, ACS

(719) 345-2424
Seth Boughton, SWC

Seth Boughton, SWC

Aurora, Colorado
(720) 449-4121
Shannon Matlock, LPC, NCC

Shannon Matlock, LPC, NCC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 203-7021
Rodney Collins, LMFT

Rodney Collins, LMFT

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Margot Bean, LCSW

Margot Bean, LCSW

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Donna Janiec, LPC, NCC

Donna Janiec, LPC, NCC

(719) 345-2424
Heather Comensky, LPC

Heather Comensky, LPC

Aurora, Colorado
(720) 449-4121

1). Make Time for Each Other

In today's busy world, it's easy to let work and other obligations take precedence over your relationship.

Spending time together is important because it gives you a chance to reconnect and deepen your bond.

It doesn't have to be anything fancy, just make sure you're both present and enjoying each other's company.

Make sure to schedule time for quality together time. This can be anything from a weekly date night to simply taking a few minutes every day to talk about your day.  

2). Be Spontaneous

Do something unexpected that will brighten your spouse's day. It could be as simple as cooking dinner or sending a heartfelt text message during the day. Other ways to be spontaneous are:

  • Plan a weekend getaway
  • Buy tickets to a show or concert
  • Write a love note and hide it in your spouse's purse or briefcase

Being spontaneous is fun because it keeps things fresh and exciting. It's also a great way to show your spouse how much you care. 

3). Connect on a Deeper Level

Take the time to really listen to your spouse when they're talking to you. Show them that you care about what they're saying and that you're interested in their life. Some ways you can connect on a deeper level are:

  • Asking follow-up questions about what they're telling you
  • Sharing your own thoughts and feelings on the subject
  • Listening without interrupting

Connecting on a deeper level with your spouse is great because it shows that you truly care about them and want to understand them better.

4). Express Your Love in Different Ways

Sometimes it's easy to fall into a rut of saying "I love you" without really showing it. Take the time to show your spouse how much they mean to you through actions and words. Some ways you can do that are:

  • Compliment them
  • Tell them why you love them
  • Hug and kiss them often
  • Do something special for them just because

Expressing your love in different ways is important because it shows that you're thinking about your spouse and that you want to make an effort to make them feel loved.

5). Surprise Them with Gifts 

It doesn't have to be an expensive gift, but taking the time to find something that you know they'll love will show them how much you care about them. If you can find a gift that matches their personality or hobbies, then that's even better.

Some ideas for gifts are:

  • Tickets to a show or game
  • A gift certificate to their favorite restaurant or store
  • A new book or movie that you know they'll enjoy
  • A basket filled with their favorite things

Giving gifts is a great way to make your spouse feel special because it shows them that you're thinking about them and that you want to make them happy.

6). Plan Special Outings Together

Whether it's a weekend getaway or just tickets to their favorite band's concert, planning something special will give you both something to look forward to and create lasting memories together.

Experiences together are always better than material things, so try to focus on that when planning your outing.

Some ideas for special outings are:

  • A weekend at a bed and breakfast
  • Tickets to a play or musical
  • A day trip to a nearby city or town
  • A picnic in the park

Planning special outings is great because it gives you time to focus on each other and have fun together. It's also a nice way to break up the monotony of everyday life.

7). Show Physical Affection

One way to make your spouse feel special is to physically show them affection.

This can be anything from holding hands to kissing to hugging to cuddling. It's important to physically express your love for your partner.

Sometimes a simple touch can say more than words ever could.

8). Don't Take Them for Granted

It's so easy to take our spouses for granted, especially after we've been married for a while. We start to get comfortable and stop doing the little things that we did when we were first dating.

It's important to keep the romance alive by regularly doing things that make your spouse feel special.

This can be anything from cooking their favorite meal to buying them flowers to taking them on a weekend getaway.

Whatever it is, make sure they know that they are still the most important person in your life.


How do I make my spouse feel special over text?

Here are some ideas:

  • Send a sweet and heartfelt message in the middle of the day
  • Tell them how much you love and appreciate them
  • Send a cute photo with a loving message attached
  • Plan a surprise for later in the day or week
  • What are some thoughtful things to do for your spouse?

Some thoughtful things you can do for your spouse are:

  • Write them a heartfelt letter expressing your love and appreciation for them
  • Make them breakfast in bed
  • Plan a surprise weekend getaway
  • Do something that they've been wanting to do but haven't had the time for
  • What are some romantic things to do for your spouse?


Making your spouse feel special is an important part of keeping your marriage strong and healthy.

By taking the time to do thoughtful things for them, you can keep the spark alive in your relationship no matter how long you've been together.

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April 15th, 2024

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