How to Bring Back Intimacy in a Marriage

Intimacy is a vital part of any marriage, but sometimes it can be tough to keep the spark alive...

Marriage
March 21, 2025

Intimacy is a vital part of any marriage, but sometimes it can be tough to keep the spark alive.If you're feeling like your intimacy levels have taken a dip, don't worry – there are plenty of ways to bring the passion back.This may take a little work, but it'll be well worth it in the end.Just follow these tips and you'll be on your way to a more intimate marriage in no time!

Talk to Your Spouse About What Intimacy Means to Them

When it comes to intimacy in marriage, it's important to remember that everyone is different.What one person might consider being intimate may not be the same for their spouse.That's why it's so important to have a conversation about intimacy and what it means to each of you.Only then can you begin to find common ground and work towards rebuilding the intimacy in your marriage. Intimacy is not just about sex, it's about emotional closeness and connection.It's about feeling safe and loved, and being able to share your deepest thoughts and feelings with your spouse. If you're not sure where to start, try asking your spouse what they love about being married to you.What are the little things that make them feel loved and cherished? Other questions you can ask are what makes them feel most connected to you?Once you know the answers to these questions, you can start working on making those things a part of your daily life.

Woman and man in an embrace

Be More Understanding and Supportive Toward Your Spouse

It's no secret that marriages can go through tough times.The stress of work, kids, and everyday life can take a toll on even the strongest of relationships.If you find yourself in a situation where you feel like the intimacy has gone out of your marriage, it's important to take action.Luckily, there are some simple steps you can take to bring the spark back.Consider being understanding and supportive toward your spouse. Marriage is a team effort, and you need to be there for each other through thick and thin. Some ways you can be supportive are:

Listening to your spouse when they need to talk

  • Helping out around the house
  • Being understanding when they're going through a tough time
  • Lending a shoulder to cry on
  • These are just a few examples, but the point is that you need to be there for each other.
  • No one is perfect, and everyone needs a little help now and then.

By being supportive, you'll create a stronger emotional bond that can help to bring back the intimacy in your marriage.

Make Time for Each Other, Even if It's Just 10 Minutes a Day

This time can be used to talk, listen, or just to be together.Intimacy isn't just about sex, it's about emotional closeness.It's important to keep that closeness alive in your relationship, even when life gets busy.If you're not sure how to start, try setting aside some time each day to talk without distractions.Turn off the TV, put away your phones, and focus on each other.You may be surprised at how much you have to say when you're listening.

Initiate Physical Contact More Often - Hugs, Kisses, Holding Hands

If you're looking to bring back the spark in your marriage, one of the best things you can do is to initiate physical contact more often.Hugs, kisses, and holding hands are all great ways to show your partner that you still care about them.Plus, touch has been shown to have a variety of health benefits, including reducing stress levels and increasing feelings of happiness and well-being.So if you're looking to improve your marriage, make sure to add a little more touch to your relationship.

Communicate Openly and Honestly with Your Spouse

Many times, we withhold information from our spouses because we think it will hurt their feelings or make them angry.However, this only leads to further distance and resentment. Instead, try to be open and honest about your thoughts and feelings, even if it isn't easy.This will help to create a more trusting and intimate relationship.Additionally, make sure to listen to your spouse when they are sharing their own thoughts and feelings.Try to really understand their perspective, even if you don't agree with it.

This type of open and honest communication is essential for rebuilding intimacy in a marriage.

people's hands reaching out to each other

Don't Take Your Marriage for Granted - Work at it Every Day!

Don't take your marriage for granted. Work at it every day.Just as you work to maintain your health, or improve your career, you need to work on your marriage.Bring back the intimacy by making time for each other every day.Talk, laugh, touch, and be there for each other. Small things can make a big difference.A little effort can go a long way toward restoring the closeness you once shared.So don't delay. Start working on your marriage today. It's the most important relationship you'll ever have.

Talk to a Professional if Needed

If you've tried everything and you're still struggling to bring back the intimacy in your marriage, it may be time to seek professional help.A therapist can help you identify the root of the problem and find new ways to improve your relationship.So if you consistently get that 'we are stuck' feeling, don't hesitate to reach out for help.

Disclaimer

The information in this blog post should be used for informational purposes only. Do not substitute the content of this blog post for official medical advice from a licensed professional.

Conclusion

Intimacy is an important part of a happy and healthy marriage.If you're looking to bring back the spark in your relationship, there are a number of things you can do.Try to be supportive, make time for each other, initiate physical contact, communicate openly and honestly, and don't take your marriage for granted.If you're struggling to make these changes on your own, seek professional help.With a little effort, you can rekindle the intimacy in your marriage and enjoy a happier and healthier relationship.

Author
Jennifer Luttman, LPC, ACS

I am a Licensed Professional Counselor, and owner of Overcomers Counseling. I'm dedicated to helping individuals find strength and healing through life’s challenges. With a deep understanding of mental health and years of professional experience, I specialize in fostering hope and resilience while equipping her clients with tools to thrive. Passionate about empowering others, she creates a safe, supportive space where everyone feels seen, valued, and capable of overcoming obstacles on their path to well-being.

Common Questions about Marriage

Can couples therapy make things worse?

It's possible for therapy to bring up difficult feelings or conflicts. However, this is often part of the process of resolving issues and improving your relationship. It's important to communicate with your therapist if you're finding sessions too difficult.

How long does marriage counseling take?

Again, this will depend on the specific goals and needs of the couple. Some couples may only need a few sessions, while others may need more.

How do I make my spouse feel special over text?

Here are some ideas:

  • Send a sweet and heartfelt message in the middle of the day
  • Tell them how much you love and appreciate them
  • Send a cute photo with a loving message attached
  • Plan a surprise for later in the day or week
  • What are some thoughtful things to do for your spouse?

Some thoughtful things you can do for your spouse are:

  • Write them a heartfelt letter expressing your love and appreciation for them
  • Make them breakfast in bed
  • Plan a surprise weekend getaway
  • Do something that they've been wanting to do but haven't had the time for
  • What are some romantic things to do for your spouse?

How long does it take to build trust in a relationship?

Trust is built over time through positive experiences and interactions. However, it can be difficult to say how long it will take to build trust in a particular relationship as it varies from couple to couple.

Can trust be rebuilt if it is damaged in a relationship?

Yes, trust can often be rebuilt if it is damaged in a relationship. This process may take some time and effort, but it is possible to regain trust.

Is it normal to feel nervous before starting couples therapy?

Yes, it's completely normal. Starting therapy can feel daunting as it often involves discussing sensitive topics. It's important to remember that it's okay to feel this way and that your therapist is there to support you.