Conflict Resolution in Marriages

Conflict Resolution in Marriages

Have you ever been in a situation that had a good deal of conflict or confrontation?

If you have, then you know how painful it is or can be.

One especially painful or challenging situation to deal with is that of an unhealthy marital relationship.

Unhealthy marital relationships usually involve situations in which conflict cannot be easily resolved, especially on your own.

That is why we have outlined the following five habits for healthy conflict resolution in marriages:

Marriages & Couples Therapists in Colorado

Jennifer Luttman, LPC, ACS

Jennifer Luttman, LPC, ACS

Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Randal Thomas, SWC

Randal Thomas, SWC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 602-1342
Jessica Gutierrez-Gaytan, SWC

Jessica Gutierrez-Gaytan, SWC

Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Heather Comensky, LPC

Heather Comensky, LPC

Aurora, Colorado
(720) 449-4121
Katie (Kate) Castillo, MS, LPCC

Katie (Kate) Castillo, MS, LPCC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Abigail Corless, LPCC

Abigail Corless, LPCC

Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Margot Bean, LCSW

Margot Bean, LCSW

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Olivia Woodring, LPCC, NCC

Olivia Woodring, LPCC, NCC

Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Melanie Klinke, MA, MFTC, LPCC

Melanie Klinke, MA, MFTC, LPCC

Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Melvin Lee, LPCC

Melvin Lee, LPCC

Colorado
(719) 345-2424

Understand Your Own Wrongdoings

When it comes to conflict resolution in marriages, most of us can say that we have trouble when it comes to owning up to our own faults and wrongdoings.

We all have potential weaknesses that can lead to our ultimate downfall if they are not kept in check.

This is why it is important for you to know yourself more, so as to address the conflict in a healthy manner.

When you are aware of your own issues and weaknesses, then you will be more likely to prevent further distress or anxiety.

Although conflict cannot always be prevented, especially in cases of unhealthy relationships, the way that you handle it can always be controlled.

This would include taking a look at how you or others have dealt with conflict in the past, and sincerely considering whether these methods have worked for you or not.

If they have, then you can continue to utilize them.

But if they haven't, then you can consider them to be learning experiences and reconsider how you'd like to handle conflict in the future.

Confront Your Partner Lovingly

If you would like to resolve any type of conflict in your marriage, you should consider that you need to confront your partner lovingly regarding the situation at hand.

Healthy conflict resolution in marriages of any kind requires you to humble yourself but also be firm or assertive whenever facing your partner.

Make sure that you know the difference between confrontation and criticism, and always maintain a sensitive attitude toward your partner.

It is important to remember that you should convey respect, but also ask for respect in return.

Additionally, if you focus on actions and behavior rather than on your spouse's moral character, then you'll experience more of a likelihood of reaching conflict resolution far more easily.

Always use "I" statements, so as to avoid attacking the other person.

If you understand that it's important to focus on facts rather than personal judgments, then you'll reach solutions much more quickly and achieve a much stronger sense of conflict resolution in marriages.

It is important to have good listening skills and to communicate your needs directly to your spouse instead of keeping everything to yourself.

Instead of viewing arguments or conflict as competition, you should try to understand where your partner is coming from.

If you're sensitive to your partner's needs, then you'll show him or her that you care, rather than making incorrect assumptions or judgments about him or her.

If you'd like to maintain healthy conflict resolution in marriages, then you should give the benefit of the doubt, and take into consideration that your spouse might have been experiencing a difficult day at work, or some other hardship that you do not know about.

Be sure to check your true motives when having conversations or confrontations with your spouse as well.

Maintain a Sense of Calm Composure

Although it may be challenging to clearly and concisely explain yourself, it is important to do so if you'd like to maintain consistent communication with your spouse.

Resolving conflict in marriages is not easy, but it is possible if you challenge yourself to have a positive, calm, and peaceful attitude

.Explain how his or her behavior makes you feel and also be firm about your expectations for the future.

For instance, if your partner yells or screams in your face in order to express him or herself, then it is important for you to convey your true feelings, in a calm and composed manner, regarding how this method of communication makes you feel.

The building of mutual trust and respect is significant because it will ultimately make you feel less combative toward your spouse.

Find a Supportive Environment to Express Yourself

If you'd like to find the correct path to conflict resolution in marriages, then it would be helpful if you found a positive or healthy environment for you to openly discuss your problems or concerns.

From there, you'll be able to focus on both positive and negative aspects of the situation.

If you come to a mutual understanding of one another without any sort of manipulation or scare tactics, then you'll be able to form a much clearer understanding of the exact problem at hand.

It might be especially helpful to focus on one problem at a time rather than taking on too much at once.

Also, if you would like to achieve a healthy sense of conflict resolution in marriages, you should pay attention to each other's strengths and weaknesses.

Always remember that for every weakness or disagreement comes an opportunity for growth, improvement, and understanding. 

Have a Sense of Humor

Though humor is not always an appropriate method for conflict resolution in marriages, having a sense of humor can be beneficial if you'd like to demonstrate love to your partner or to avoid tension in the relationship.

It can help you to feel much less defensive, view the world in an entirely new light, redirect negative or unpleasant emotions, or find creative outlets as means of problem-solving.

While there are certain types of humor that are definitely not helpful for conflict resolution in marriages, having a sense of humor can add a sense of light-heartedness that would not have been able to be attained otherwise. 

Conclusion

Conflict resolution in marriages can be resolved in a variety of ways, but there are good and bad aspects of any type of conflict resolution.

Having a sense of humor can help to distract your attention from the problem at hand, but it can't always immediately address the core issue.

If you find a supportive environment to express yourself in, then you'll be able to maintain a sense of calm, but the sense of turmoil may return once you go back to more tumultuous environments.

Maintaining a sense of calm composure can help you feel more peaceful, but you can't always force these types of emotions to come about.

Confronting your partner in a loving manner is very noble, but not always easy to do, especially if you are harboring negative feelings toward him or her.

If you come to a greater sense of your own wrongdoings, then you'll take ownership for what you have done incorrectly, but you may not realize what your spouse has done wrong.

But overall, achieving a sense of conflict resolution in marriages is very possible, even if it is not always easy.

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July 18th, 2024

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