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As much as you fear that your child may be overwhelmed by the truth, it's still important to tell them the truth so it can help your child cope with a divorce.
When you want to tell them, ensure it's after the divorce process has been finalized and not when it's still being considered, and also ensure you will be with them after telling them, to console them with words and hugs.
If possible, try to tell your child with your partner to avoid confusion and allow your child to hear a mutual agreement to separate, which will ensure that the child will continue to trust both of you equally.
Try to be as simple as possible in your explanation, avoiding the deep emotional bits to prevent them from getting confused and only focusing on what is happening, and the days they will spend with both of you.
It will be a terrible sight for your kid if you fight your partner in front of them as it triggers feelings of sadness and anxiety; thus, you should avoid doing so if you want to help your child cope with a divorce.
You should also not try to block your partner's access to your kid since the child is for both of you, and the child will still long for their parent regardless of what has happened between both of you; therefore, allow an unfettered relationship between them.
Another way to help your child cope with a divorce is to erase the possibility of a situation where they have to choose between you and your partner; try not to make it seem like they aren't allowed to love your partner.
Ensure to think of what's fair to your child, and not only focus on what's acceptable to you as the actions fair to you may not be fair to them; hence, you would be hurting them without knowing.
Usually, kids blame themselves when their parents divorce because their developing minds believe every action in the marriage revolves around them; thus, it’s your duty to take such self-blame away from their minds by telling them they aren’t the fault and you love them.
It’s not enough to say loving words when you want to help your child cope with a divorce, you also have to show it, and you can do this by being an active listener whenever they want to talk to you; ensure you put your gadgets and other distractions away when they initiate a conversation with you.
You can equally show them you love them by creating having fun together through video games, board games, or physical games, allowing you to prove your love to them by creating time out of your schedule to play with them.
Similarly, you may make a special routine for both of you to engage in, such as a bedtime story routine, a special outing every Friday, or a TV show every evening, giving you something unique to share.
A child mourning the loss of their parents’ union can be a painful sight for any parent who wants to always see their child in high spirits and a good mood, hence crafting different tips to help put the child back in high spirits.
If you desire to help your child cope with a divorce, try to tell the child the truth about the situation, allow them to express their emotions, including other people in their recovery, desist from fighting your partner in front of them, and let them know you love them.
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Many of us are often faced with struggles and hardships and finding help can be difficult. However, at Overcomers Counseling, we are here to help you in your time of need. We are passionate about people and we believe that ANYONE can be an overcomer if they are willing to pursue it. Don't let another day go by without getting the help you desire.
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