Why Parenting Is More Difficult Now (2021)

Why Parenting Is More Difficult Now (2021)

Are you a new parent struggling with the new responsibilities? Maybe you are wondering that you are the only one finding parenting to be more difficult now. Either way, you are not completely wrong about this notion; neither are you alone.

Did you know 88 percent of Moms and Dads admit that parenting is more difficult now than before?

Today, many parents complain about parenting getting difficult. Increasing demands and higher standards of being a good parent in the digital age has made many parents question their skills and commitment to the cause.

Parents find themselves exhausted with no time for themselves, which sometimes affects their mental, physical, and emotional wellbeing. People in a relationship no longer get time for themselves and lose that spark they once shared.


The Exertion takes Its Toll

Have you lost the zest to have fun, socialize, or even indulge in sex with your spouse since you became a parent? Well, it is one of the signs that the exhaustion of being a modern-day parent is taking its toll on your psychological existence.

All you can remember is running around the kids, cleaning after them a gazillion times a day, making meals, and doing laundering. When you are free from these activities, you find yourself at parents' meetings, taking them to football practice, or helping them with homework.

Is this what your life is now? Then no wonder you are feeling the frustrations of unexpected exertion that parenting is putting your through.

The situation gets worst tenfold if you are a parent of a teenager who has recently discovered the world of social media. This brings its own sets of new challenges for you as a parent, i.e.,

  • Worrying about your children's safety due to their exposure to the horrors of social media such as cyberbullying, explicit material, and lurking sex-offenders.
  • You have constantly counsel your children about depression and anxiety after social media bullying and threats by schoolmates and others.

This, in turn, affects your mental health too. That said, whether you are a dad or a mom, find solace in the fact that you are not the only one feeling despair. There may be variations to the stories, but most parents experience the same stress and exhaustion while trying to find the perfect parenting style for their children.


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Are you Overdoing It?

It is good to be a dedicated parent but are you overdoing it? Remember, there is a fine line between being caring and being obsessive.

Julie Lythcott-Haims is the dean of freshmen at Stanford University and the author of "How to Raise an Adult." She reveals that most parents believe that being overprotective and displaying hand-holding behavior is going to make their kids successful, confident, and happy.

Is this a healthy behavior or not is a different debate; however, parenting is certainly tiring and stressful physically, mentally, and emotionally.

There is no shame in admitting that you are struggling to cope with parenting demands in 2021. It is true that investment in your children's development can take its toll on your life. Not only do you feel lost within, but it also affects your bonding with the children.

As a parent, do you feel that you have sacrificed everything you once had to bring up your kids? It is a common occurrence that while you try to nurture your kids physically, psychologically, and emotionally, you ignore and deplete your emotional and mental wellbeing.


Sooner or later, frustration and guilt kick in when your children ask for more, and you feel agitated for having done enough already. Whether you are a single parent or a couple, it is never easy to get the parenting responsibilities right day-in and day out.


How to Cope and Get Back up Again

The chances are that you are making parenting way harder than it actually is. Yes, your children need your love, warmth, dedication, and quality time. However, that does not mean that you have to be present in front of them 24/7.

Let them play alone and decide for themselves small aspects of their lives such as games they wish to play, getting ready when going out, etc. Trying to spoon-feed them will spoil them, and how long do you think you can do it for?

You do not have to stand guard while your children play or do their homework. It is perfectly fine to use opportunities like these as "me time." Go spend time with your spouse, talk to a friend, listen to music, and watch a movie, read a book, or whatever rocked your boat before you became a parent.

Remember, letting your kids learn to be independent does not make you a bad parent at all. In fact, it gives them self-confidence, emotional stability, and helps them to learn from their experiences. What you have to ensure is to be there when they need you.

Today's parenting is about tactical defense and helping your children learn the skills to cope with the unexpected. You may not be there all the time, so teach your kids to be emotionally and psychologically strong to deal with certain aspects of life and social situations that even you as an adult may struggle with at the time.

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Tips for Modern Day Parenting

Here are the tips that you need to follow as a good parent.

  • Adopt a flexible but authoritative parenting style and adjust as your children grow up
  • Work on boosting your children's self-esteem
  • If you see your kids behaving well, reward them
  • Set rules and be consistent as a disciplinary parent
  • Practice what you preach and be a good role model
  • Encourage two-way communication between yourself and the children
  • Do not ignore your needs; being emotionally and mentally stable will help you cope with the parenting responsibilities with resilience.

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Let's face it; we are all humans and have our strengths and vulnerabilities. Recognize your strong suits as a parent and hone them while being a loving and dedicated parent. Do not let your weaknesses bring you down; instead, work on them with consistency and discipline.

Remember, it is not selfish to focus on your needs. Taking care of your own mental wellbeing will eventually help you nurture your children in a much more productive, affectionate, and effective manner.


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July 18th, 2024

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