When a relationship or marriage ends up dissolving, and there are children shared together from that relationship, in the beginning, it can be hard to navigate the world of co-parenting.
Especially if your children are young.
However, with a little work at it from both sides, you both can come to a great co-parenting agreement that works for both of you.
Here are some of our favorite co-parenting tips with toddlers to let them know they are loved.
As parents, you still have to make decisions together that are in the best interest of your child.
That is why it is important to keep your child(ren) within the center of all of the co-parenting discussions that you and your ex-partner will have.
While the two of you may not agree on everything, or perhaps even like each other, but coming together for the sake of your child is what is the most important thing to do when it comes to being a co-parent to a young child.
One key in a successful co-parenting relationship is the need to communicate in a more effective and efficient way.
Do not just only use convenient communication tools like texting or chatting, but call them on the phone when the need to speak to them arises.
When you get the chance, try to talk to each other face-to-face when possible so that the two of you can discuss anything that is going on in your children's lives.
By doing this, nobody is going to be blindsided by any information that one or the other may have forgotten to tell each other.
That is the importance of regular communication, not just when they come to pick up the kids.
To become successful co-parents, each needs to have a basic understanding of what the needs of the children are.
For example, you want to have a plan in place when it comes to things like health situations, school events, religion/spirituality, and more. Oftentimes it can help to actually write down the plan.
Both of you should have a copy of the plan and reference it if needed.
But if you are co-parenting amicably, you shouldn't have to reference it.
But it is good to have.
Not only that, but when you have a plan, children know what to expect and aren't upset by any potential surprises.
Another important aspect of co-parenting toddlers is to try to stick to routines at both houses.
Children thrive when they know what is coming and things don't massively differentiate from the both of you keeping a routine.
Pickups and drop-offs should be routine, and without any drama.
Plans should be kept unless there is a massive need to cancel.
Children should know which parent is going to pick them up from school and when.
When they have this information and more, your children will be able to see that the two of you are successfully able to communicate with each other about these things.
When schedules get messed up or lines get crossed, it can create anxiety in kids.
The best way to avoid these is to find an online calendar or calendar app, that helps to sync everyone's schedule up, so you and your ex both know what is going on and when.
There are even some great co-parenting apps out there on the market that offer up scheduling and calendar options.
Even the most successful co-parents will eventually have a disagreement.
But it is in your children's best interests to keep the disagreements private, if possible.
Children will have already likely seen arguments and fights.
If you or your partner do not agree on the same thing, try to first talk about it civilly.
But if you do disagree, try to take it outside, or into a room where the children are not around.
Additionally, you could talk about it via e-mail or text - because, at that point, you are getting it in writing, just in case you may need it in the future.
When you are teaching your children all about chores and how to perform daily tasks, it can be hard enough on its own.
But if you are a separated or divorced parent, it can be hard to try and get the kids to stay on the same schedule at each house.
Perhaps the other parent's home has more lax rules.
This can create confusion in the child. It is important to discuss the topic of rules, and agree on a same, set-upon group of rules and chores that should be performed at both houses.
Children have a more consistent sense of security when they know that the same things are happening in each household.
No matter how tempting it may seem to talk about your ex, in front of say, your best friend or your parent, try to keep it positive when you talk about them.
It may seem hard in the beginning, but by not saying anything negative about your ex, you are making sure that your child does not grow to resent the other parent.
It also goes both ways, too, and your partner should also agree to that same rule as well.
After all, you do not want your child to talk disrespectfully about you, so try to commit to keeping it light when talking about your ex when your children are around the vicinity.
When you sit down with your ex-partner and really map out a plan to successfully co-parent, keep in mind all of the tips above.
Always make certain that at the heart of both of your decisions lies the best interest of your child(ren).
Remember that children thrive on security and routine.
By really sticking to the routine you have set forth for co-parenting, you will surely be able to do so in a civil and pleasant way.
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