How to Help Your Child Grow Past Tantrums

How to Help Your Child Grow Past Tantrums

Dealing with your kid's temper tantrums can make you feel like a bad parent since the tantrum rarely stops. 

However, don't feel bad. Tantrums are expected, and you can help your child grow past tantrums and achieve good mental well-being by utilizing specific necessary skills.

In tantrums, your child may exhibit aggressive behaviors like breaking items, hitting someone, or hurting themselves. 

No matter how loving you are and how cute they are, it's essential that you stop them immediately if you want the best mental state for their future self.

Furthermore, you should allow the tantrum to run its course. 

Leave your child to be angry; they are processing their emotions and will need the complete processing to get in tune with their emotions quickly. 

Since tantrums are generally caused by an inability to communicate correctly, this tactic is incredibly beneficial.

Also, if you feel the tantrum has gone on for too long, you can try to distract them with fun activities or items. 

You may give them their favorite toys or put on their best cartoons. 

You may even feed them their favorite meal, anything to distract them.

Explore the article for ways to help your child grow past tantrums:

Children Therapists in Colorado

Margot Bean, LCSW

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Colorado Springs, Colorado
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Melissa Peterson, LPC

Melissa Peterson, LPC

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Jenifer Seas, LCSW

Jenifer Seas, LCSW

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Cassondra Chagnon, LPCC

Cassondra Chagnon, LPCC

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Lauren Wilkerson, SWC

Lauren Wilkerson, SWC

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Naomi Kettner, LPC, NCC

Naomi Kettner, LPC, NCC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 452-4374

Address Aggressive Actions Immediately 

As innocent as your child's reason for the tantrum may be, it's essential that you shut down aggressive behavior instantly. If you love and want to help your child grow past tantrums, you should handle aggressive behavior so that they won't turn into a violent human.
Kids throwing tantrums may begin to bite or punch people around them, including you. Some other kids may inflict self-harm in a bid to elicit attention. Some kids may also start to break items. All these actions stem from their inability to deal with their emotions.
If they cannot deal with their emotions and continue to be aggressive because of your acceptance, your child may become a violent person. Since our childhood primarily shapes us, it's reasonable to assume this.
Instead of waiting for them to calm down before stopping their rage-induced violence, stop them immediately with firm words. Training a child should be gentle, but not when such a child is being violent.

Allow Your Kid to be Angry

You can help your child grow past tantrums by letting the tantrum run for a reasonable period. 

Kids have emotions, and they also need to let them out. 

With excellent communication skills, they would be able to. 

However, with their limited vocabulary and emotional development, they are usually left with tantrums as means of expression.

Observing your child's anger signs can help you deal with their tantrums better. 

Once you identify the signs, such as a clenched fist, tense muscles, or clenched teeth, you know the anger is coming, and you can leave them to let it pan out.

It's noteworthy that leaving them doesn't mean ignoring them.

It means you will be around them without trying to caution them to stop feeling angry. 

You will be in the vicinity to ensure that there's no excess to the anger.

After the anger runs its course, you can talk to them to help them ease their tension.

Also, they may be embarrassed at how they felt and what they did. It's your duty in that instance to help them understand their anger and show them it's normal.

Distract Them 

If your child's anger is taking too long to calm down, it may be time to distract them with your knowledge of what they may like. 

You should help your child grow past tantrums if you want them to grow up with great mental well-being.

An excellent way to distract them is to change their location.

If they get angry in the room, you can take them to the porch and engage in something else. 

Changing the location is excellent as it prevents them from seeing possible environmental triggers.

You can also sing interesting songs or rhymes with them. 

With their best songs, you can't go wrong as the songs will instill the usual feelings of happiness.

Be sure to start the singing and prod them to continue.

With their favorite cartoons and toys, you can engage them in a distraction exercise, helping you to take their mind off the tantrum. 

They will forget what they were up to in no time, and the more this happens, the lower the rates of tantrums.

Don't Yell at Your Child

Getting angry to stop your child's anger is counterintuitive.

To help your child grow past tantrums, you must be calm when talking to them. 

Using anger to shut them up will not help their mental well-being because it may make them believe their emotions are worthless.

Rather than yelling at them, you can take a personal timeout. 

Go to the bathroom, car, porch, or kitchen. Just go wherever you desire and try to destress there. 

That will help you diffuse the situation and keep your child's respect.

To help their mental well-being, you should also try to reduce your expectations. 

Don't expect your child to discuss their feelings as quickly as an adult.

Instead, indulge their low communication attempts and talk to them more to express their feelings.

Sometimes, you may be the one with emotional troubles, and trying to respond to your kid in such moments will involve yelling. 

Ensure you check yourself well to prevent such outbursts and protect your kid's mental health from your yelling.

Pet Them With Hugs

After their tantrum, talk to your child and hug them. 

With this method, you can help your child grow past tantrums as it allows them to feel comfortable enough to speak with you during another episode.

Besides the hugs, try to ensure that you also recognize their good actions. 

Don't be present and consoling only when they throw tantrums. 

When they do good, applaud them. This will help them understand that there's good in them.

When applauding their good deeds, don't focus on monetary rewards. 

You should try abstract emotional-based things, such as picking what everyone will eat or spending more time with you.

Doing this will enable them to understand people dynamics more, allowing them to communicate better.

All these positive methods are essential for your kid's growth beyond tantrums. 

They will reinforce their trust in your love for them and show them that you want the best for them.


If you desire to help your child grow past tantrums and strengthen their mental wellbeing, you should address aggressive actions immediately, allow them to be angry, distract them, not yell at them, and pet them with hugs.


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July 21st, 2024

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