Effective Ways to Support Your Grieving Partner

Effective Ways to Support Your Grieving Partner

Dealing with your own grief is a difficult task, but what about helping your partner through theirs?

It's a valid concern to ponder how one may comfort a bereaved spouse or partner.

Since mourning is an individual experience, there is no definitive guidebook outlining proper protocol.

However, if handled poorly or without enough grief support, the reverse might happen, and a rift can form between you.

Some ways you can support your grieving partner involve encouraging them to communicate their feelings to you.

While you learn more about how they are feeling, you provide them a means to let out any pent-up emotions.

An important thing to remember is that grief doesn't have an end date.

Even your partner may not know how long it will take them to mourn their loss.

This is why giving them space, when needed, is also important.

Some people want to be cuddled when they lose a loved one; others just want space.

Read on to learn more about effective ways to support your grieving partner. 

Grief & Loss Therapists in Colorado

Heather Comensky, LPC

Heather Comensky, LPC

Aurora, Colorado
(720) 449-4121
Kristen Yamaoka-Los, LPC

Kristen Yamaoka-Los, LPC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 481-3518
Paitton Callery, LPC, ATR-P

Paitton Callery, LPC, ATR-P

Pueblo, Colorado
(719) 696-3439
Winnie Siwa, LPCC

Winnie Siwa, LPCC

Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Kelsey Maestas, LPCC

Kelsey Maestas, LPCC

Pueblo, Colorado
(719) 696-3439
Joshua Goldberg, LPCC

Joshua Goldberg, LPCC

Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Mallory Heise, LPC, LAC

Mallory Heise, LPC, LAC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 602-1342
Leigh Harlan, LPC

Leigh Harlan, LPC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 602-1342
Janelle Wagenknecht, MA, LPCC, ADDC

Janelle Wagenknecht, MA, LPCC, ADDC

Colorado
(720) 710-0919
Amber Chambless, LPC

Amber Chambless, LPC

Colorado
(720) 449-4121

Encourage Them to Communicate With You

One of the most useful ways to support your grieving partner is to encourage them to have a conversation about their loss.

You need not be an expert on grieving or have all the answers to be supportive.

What you need to do is be there to listen when they're ready to talk.

Keep in mind that they may also have lost the person they shared everything with; therefore, they will need something to fill that void.

If you do not feel up to playing this position, it is crucial that you assist them in locating a suitable confidant.

Even if it helps things go more smoothly in the short term, nobody benefits from emotional repression in the long run.

Talking and sharing is one of the finest methods to go through their feelings and start to achieve a place of acceptance.

Keep in Mind That Grief Has No End Date

Experiencing loss is an individual experience with no predetermined timeline.

The time it takes to get over a loss is very individual; many individuals need a couple of months or years to heal, and some may need more or less.

You should not force your mourning partner to feel like they need to move on.

The healing process might be slowed down by this.

They will eventually quit sobbing every day.

And soon, life will go back to normal for them.

However, the pain of loss never fades away entirely.

To accept this and to see that there is usually more going on under the surface takes some maturity.

One way you can support your grieving partner is by being there for them while they work through their pain.

It's crucial to the success of a relationship, but don't expect it to be a breeze.

Let Them Have Space

Handling sorrow or loss isn't something you need to do for other people; everyone grieves in their own way.

When a spouse wants to be alone, it's unproductive to try to coax them to do stuff or, generally, to overwhelm them with love and care.

There may be moments when your significant other wants to be alone and others when they need you to be there for them.

Don't bother them if they say they need some time to themselves

They only need to know that they can count on you to be there for them at any time.

Allow them the room and independence to do as they like.

Though it's understandable to want to comfort your spouse at a time of loss, doing so might be stifling if they need time alone to go through their feelings.

Just be there for them, even if it means giving them space, and hear them out as they share what they need and want from you at this trying time.

Also, grievers often benefit from being near those who understand what they're going through.

Help Put Things Together 

Another way to support your grieving partner is by helping them carry out various tasks that they have to do.

For example, if your partner is supposed to be the one making arrangements for the deceased, this is where you can step in.

This is because trying to organize a funeral or memorial service while you're still reeling from the loss of a loved one may be a terrible experience.

While some individuals may simply force themselves to concentrate, others may need a little more assistance putting the pieces together.

Assisting them in making decisions concerning the funeral will help reduce the burden they may be feeling.

Also, when your partner is grieving, don't rely on this person to do their fair share of chores around the home.

Don't feel like you have to shoulder all the housework by yourself just because of this.

What you can do is deal with the influx of well-intentioned offers of assistance.

Helping your spouse out by relieving some of their burdens is vital during these times.

Offer Emotional Support Without Judgment 

The first step is to recognize how you can give emotional assistance to a grieving spouse or partner.

When someone is mourning, the emotional support they may get from their loved ones can make all the difference in their ability to recover.

One method to emotionally support your grieving partner is to sit and listen to their stories about the person they lost.

It might also be from often hearing the individual go over the details of the death of a loved one.

Being emotionally supportive also entails being available to your spouse even if they don't want to talk and respecting their desire for silence.

Conclusion

In a long-term relationship, it's likely that both parties may eventually lose a loved one, so learning how to support one another as best you can is essential.

After the death of someone dear, your partner will need more love, care, grief support, and understanding from you.

Some effective ways to support your grieving partner include encouraging them to communicate with you, keeping in mind that grief doesn't have an end date, letting them have space, helping put things together, and offering emotional support without judgment.

Resources 

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July 14th, 2024

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