5 Ways to Enhance Your Child's Assertiveness

5 Ways to Enhance Your Child's Assertiveness

As a parent, assertiveness is one of the character traits to teach your child to aid their mental growth and character development.

Children who lack assertiveness find it difficult to stand up for themselves.

Thus, it is important to enhance your child's assertiveness.

You can support your child who struggles with assertiveness by encouraging them to make decisions independently.

Indecision is usually an indication of a lack of assertiveness in children.

When you teach your child how to stick to the decisions they make, it increases their level of confidence.

Another way to improve your child's assertiveness is by encouraging them to participate in extra-curricular activities.

Extra-curricular activities boost your child's social skills and allow your child to be bold while dealing with their peers.

Your child becomes more assertive when you make them feel important.

You can make your child feel important by actively listening to them and acting on what they tell you.

They become more assertive when your child knows that you respect them enough to do what they tell you.

Some other ways you can enhance your child's assertiveness include the following.

Children Therapists in Colorado

Jenifer Seas, LCSW

Jenifer Seas, LCSW

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 452-4374
Hailey Gloden, MA, LPC, NCC

Hailey Gloden, MA, LPC, NCC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 602-1342
Naomi Kettner, LPC, NCC

Naomi Kettner, LPC, NCC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 452-4374
Melissa Peterson, LPC

Melissa Peterson, LPC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 345-2424
Cassondra Chagnon, LPCC

Cassondra Chagnon, LPCC

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 481-3518
Margot Bean, LCSW

Margot Bean, LCSW

Colorado Springs, Colorado
(719) 345-2424

Encourage Your Child to Make Decisions Independently 

Allowing your child to make decisions independently is crucial in making them become independent.

Being confident enough to make decisions is an indication of assertiveness in children.

Hence, teaching your child how to make decisions and stick with them is an excellent way to enhance your child's assertiveness.

Making decisions as minor as picking which outfit to wear to a class party would go a long way in helping your child gain confidence and improve their decision making skills.

Although it might be challenging to watch your child make the wrong decisions, they will learn better from their mistakes.

Also, you might delegate some family decisions to your child. For instance, you can let your child decide what meal the family is having for dinner.

When your child makes this kind of decision for the family, and you act on it, they develop a sense of responsibility, making them feel more confident when they make their personal decisions.

Aside from the fact that allowing your child to make decisions improves their assertiveness, decision-making is an important life skill you must imbibe in a child.

We all need to make decisions at some point.

Hence, teaching your child how to make informed decisions is essential.

Encourage Your Child to Participate in Extracurricular Activities 

Extra-curricular activities are essential in making your child a well-rounded individual.

You can enhance your child's assertiveness when relating with their peers by encouraging them to participate in team sports and games.

This way, your child will develop confidence and team spirit during social interactions when playing games with friends.

Although having intimate family time with your child is essential, having them participate in extra-curricular activities enables them to practice assertiveness with their peers.

These activities allow your child to try new things and develop their strengths, improving their confidence.

Also, suppose your child's poor academic performance makes them struggle with interacting confidently with their peers.

Extra-curricular activity is an avenue for such a child to learn in a fun environment.

It also helps them see the other things they are good at besides their school work.

Your child may struggle with assertiveness because of bullying from their friends in the past which makes them scared of making new friends.

However, after school activities enable them to meet other children with similar sporting interests and make new friends, which allows them to feel a sense of belonging.

Actively Listen to Your Child and Act on Their Inputs

As a parent, you may overlook what your child tells you because of their young age.

However, if you want to enhance your child's assertiveness, you need to pay attention to every detail your child tells you and react to them.

Actively listening to your child would show them that they matter and their opinions also matter.

To actively listen to your child, you should give your child your undivided attention.

Ensure you maintain eye contact with them and make them know you understand and are following what they are telling you.

Also, it is essential to come down to your child's level when discussing with them.

You should not only listen to what your child tells you, but you should also act on what they say.

Perhaps, your child complains about something, you can act on it by fixing that thing or giving them reasons why it's like that.

This way, your child knows you would listen to them even when they are wrong.

You can also practice active listening by paying attention to your child's feelings or emotions.

You should know when your child isn't happy and ask them why they are sad or do things that make them happy.

Your child feels you see and hear them when you notice when they are sad.

Teach Your Child Specific Assertive Behavior 

Certain assertive behaviors can enhance your child's assertiveness.

These behaviors are usually easier to teach your child because they are specific and direct.

You can consciously pick one assertive behavior at a time or look for opportunities to apply these behaviors and provide appropriate responses.

An example of assertive behavior includes teaching your child how to make requests.

Children who have a low level of assertiveness have problems with making requests because they are not confident.

You can improve your child's ability to make their requests by not making requests on their behalf .

Teaching your child how to say "no" is also essential. Your child should be confident to say no when they need to decline.

People-pleasing is not a good trait for kids because it often leads to resentment when they agree to what they shouldn't have accepted.

It is essential to teach them how to decline in a calm, positive manner to improve your child's assertiveness.

Also, when your child is uncomfortable, they should be able to speak up about their discomfort and stand their ground.

Train your child to speak up for themselves when they face situations they do not like.

Teach Your Child Emotional Intelligence 

It is normal to have feelings because humans are emotional beings.

However, teaching your child how to identify their feelings and act accordingly would enhance your child's assertiveness and confidence.

When your child can recognize their different emotions in different situations, they handle challenges more confidently.

As a parent, it is important to teach your child empathy because it's a core prerequisite for emotional intelligence.

The best way to teach your child empathy is by being empathetic to people around you.

Also, it would help to listen to your child and validate their emotions.

Let them know that you understand how they feel and it is normal for people to feel a certain way when they face certain circumstances.

Similarly, you can improve your child's emotional intelligence by assisting them in labeling their emotions.

It would improve your child's self-awareness.

It would also help to teach them how to react when they face a situation they do not like.


Assertiveness plays a huge role in improving your child's mental well-being.

Hence, it is necessary to give your child the necessary support to enhance their assertiveness.

Some ways to enhance your child's assertiveness include allowing them to make decisions independently, encouraging them to participate in extra-curricular activities, actively listening to them, teaching them specific assertive behaviors, and teaching them emotional intelligence.


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June 18th, 2024

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